not just yet
i considered taking down the blog last night. I sat staring at the Blogger window, running possible scenarios to explain the death of my blog, or my will to blog at least. I don't know if someone i was talking to online convinced me to keep it up (he's bad at clarifications, i'm not sure what he was convincing me to do). But at some point, i was convinced that maybe, just maybe, the blog will help me manage.
Established fact: i'm a bitch. But i've still got my restrictions when it comes to airing my dirty laundry in public. Which is probably why you won't know when i don't like you as much as the next person, because my smile will be just as wide, and my handshake just as warm. The only difference would probably be the amount of wit i employ, but then again, that might just slide past the top of your head, not ruffling your hair as it passes above you. I digress. I'm not keen on airing my dirty laundry in public: which is probably why people are still wondering why i do some things the way i do them. And also why people are wondering why prasad isn't as happy looking as i used to look.
Not going to explain that here. But i will let slip that i'm not having the best of times. Which is probably why i considered taking down the blog. If i'm feeling melancholy most of the time, my posts will be increasingly pensive, and i won't attract the 50 unique visitors a day i usually attract (i swear i don't have that many friends, which probably justifies the existence of..stalkers! :P). So, for fear of writing on a whiny blog, i thought i'd take the blog down because i'm gonna be in a whiny mood for quite a while.
It was called the 'navel gazer monologues' for a reason. 'Monologues' because i used to get 2 unique visitors a day (not an actual statistic, rough estimate) and 'navel gazer' because my posts were supposed to be born out of moments of boredom, and after long hours spent contemplating the beauty of my umbulicus. I now no longer have the time or mental capacity to stare at my belly button and come up with posts which might interest 50 rabid fans. And my belly button isn't that pretty after all.
But considering i'm a lazy arse, i went to bed, the blogger window still open. Woke up 6 hours later (sexy eyebags and all) and i'm typing this out. I'm not taking the blog down. I'm hoping i'm right when i think that the blog will help me through. I hope it will at least serve as a reminder as to who i was, and how i sounded before all of this. It's a life changing experience, but no one said change is a bad thing (and neither is outcry :P)
I'll be fine. I'm becoming half the boy, but twice the man (or i'm trying to, at least).
oh, and look at the sidebar! vote vote vote!
Established fact: i'm a bitch. But i've still got my restrictions when it comes to airing my dirty laundry in public. Which is probably why you won't know when i don't like you as much as the next person, because my smile will be just as wide, and my handshake just as warm. The only difference would probably be the amount of wit i employ, but then again, that might just slide past the top of your head, not ruffling your hair as it passes above you. I digress. I'm not keen on airing my dirty laundry in public: which is probably why people are still wondering why i do some things the way i do them. And also why people are wondering why prasad isn't as happy looking as i used to look.
Not going to explain that here. But i will let slip that i'm not having the best of times. Which is probably why i considered taking down the blog. If i'm feeling melancholy most of the time, my posts will be increasingly pensive, and i won't attract the 50 unique visitors a day i usually attract (i swear i don't have that many friends, which probably justifies the existence of..stalkers! :P). So, for fear of writing on a whiny blog, i thought i'd take the blog down because i'm gonna be in a whiny mood for quite a while.
It was called the 'navel gazer monologues' for a reason. 'Monologues' because i used to get 2 unique visitors a day (not an actual statistic, rough estimate) and 'navel gazer' because my posts were supposed to be born out of moments of boredom, and after long hours spent contemplating the beauty of my umbulicus. I now no longer have the time or mental capacity to stare at my belly button and come up with posts which might interest 50 rabid fans. And my belly button isn't that pretty after all.
But considering i'm a lazy arse, i went to bed, the blogger window still open. Woke up 6 hours later (sexy eyebags and all) and i'm typing this out. I'm not taking the blog down. I'm hoping i'm right when i think that the blog will help me through. I hope it will at least serve as a reminder as to who i was, and how i sounded before all of this. It's a life changing experience, but no one said change is a bad thing (and neither is outcry :P)
I'll be fine. I'm becoming half the boy, but twice the man (or i'm trying to, at least).
oh, and look at the sidebar! vote vote vote!
posted by pwasad at 5:21 PM
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